Dance

I am grateful for dance.
Dance moves me
From the inside,
Deep,
All the way
To my core.
I want to move,
To play my arms,
My legs
My entire body
Like the
Visual/
Physical/
Musical
instrument
It is.
I want to join,
To be a part
Of the dance.

Mono

I did take Cat off the shelf. We had agreed to that in the time before now. But when the time came for Cat to arrive my brother, Rick, put Cat into a sling and flung her far to the east, over the Atlantic to Ireland. We didn’t know where she landed at the time. My brother took Cat’s place. 

When my mother came home from hospital, I was so disappointed. “Where is my mono (monkey)?” I asked. “You told me that you were growing a mono (monkey) in your stomach for me,” I protested.

 [The Spanish/English dictionary defines mono as monkey. But it is far more than that. Mono is a term of affection applied to babies. Today ye might hear an aunt, or uncle say to their newborn niece or nephew, “Such a cute little teddy bear, she be.” Mono has a similar connotation.] 

The night after me mum and dad brought me baby brother, Rick, home I had a dream. Our dog, Paco, who slept under my bed, got up and lay next to me. He licked me face. I stared at him and petted his head. I started to cry. “Donde esta mi mono?” (Where be me mono?) (Me first language be Espanol.) “Your baby brother took her place,” Paco said. “Yer mum agreed.” I be beside meself. I cried harder. “Porque?” Why would she do that? Me mono and me were supposed to grow up together to protect each other. We not be like the others.” 

“It be hard to explain,” Paco said. “Yer mum has been with yer baby brother for many lifetimes. She be his protector. But Rick not be so good at protecting himself. Many a lifetime he died before he reached 3 years. He be a reckless one, Yep, Ricky Reckless he be. “Your mum say many a prayer, “Please Dear God, if you take me, please take Ricky too, no one else will put up with him. He’d drive them crazy and they’ll abuse him.” 

Me little mind be frustrated, confused and hurt. I didn’t want a little brother, I wanted me mono, me sister. “Tis yer job to help yer mum,” me dog said “And protect him so he makes it past 3.” 

I wiped me tears. “But me mono. What about her?”

 “She be fine for now? She be growing up with fine parents.”

 “But without me,” I whined. “Will I see her in this lifetime?” 

“The three of ye have much to give in this lifetime. And much to learn. Some will be very sad and some will be make ye very happy. But ye will see each other when yer older, much older.” 

“Three?” lifted Paco’s head. “Three?” 

Paco’s picked up his head and licked me face again. “Ye be having another mono, not just one,” he said. “Actually ye be having many. But these two be far away.” 

“How will I find them?”

 “A new magic will find her and her sister, Mary. Mary be the one to find her first and then she find her for ye.” 

“Mary?” I scrunched me little face. “Who be Mary?” “She be yer mono, too, over many a lifetime. Mary’ll be the first to recognize who you two actually be.” Paco licked me face. “Go back to sleep. I’ll make sure ye find yer monos in this lifetime.”